35 for 35
December 5th marks 35 years on this planet for yours truly. It felt like the right occasion to write down some of the lessons I’ve learned, and even ones I’m still learning. So without further ado, here’s my 35 lessons for 35 years.
1. You can be outgoing and friendly, and still be an introvert.
2. Fat is only a negative word when you attach negative stereotypes to it.
3. There’s nothing that a little Dave Matthews Band can’t help.
4. And chocolate.
5. And the beach.
6. You can change your mind. And then change it again.
7. Life is not black and white – it’s super, super grey.
8. Listening is better and more valuable than talking.
9. We’re all empaths – we just don’t practice enough.
10. How you talk to yourself dictates everything in your reality.
11. Water. All day long.
12. Love is love is love is love.
13. We need to SEE color, rather than say we’re “color blind,” so that we can actually be a part of fixing the inequities in this world.
14. You’re a great mama, simply because you were chosen for your babies.
15. Marriage is tough. But so are love and commitment.
16. New Year’s resolutions don’t have to be about losing weight.
17. Books. All the books.
18. Grief is a bitch. And she sticks around a long time. But she changes, and is actually a disguise for a deep, immense love.
20. Having confidence is one thing. Feeling worthy is another. You need both to get what you want.
21. Outside the box is much more colorful.
22. Black lives matter.
23. Thinking we know everything is the biggest mistake we could make.
24. “I’m sorry you feel that way” is a shitty apology. So is, “If I hurt you, I’m sorry.” An apology should include what you’re sorry for (taking responsibility), an understanding of why it hurt the person, and what the future looks like so the mistake is less likely to happen.
25. We spend way too much time not believing how beautiful we are.
28. Friendships get better as you get older.
29. You can find God in the caravan, the streets, with the grieving and the hurting. Not with the rich white guys who think they rule the world.
30. We can learn more from people who are different than we are.
31. We are much more similar than we are different.
32. Aging isn’t scary.
33. Expression is the door to peace.
34. More gratitude.
35. December birthdays are the best because there are always twinkle lights up.